Hi baby. I can only imagine what youre going through right now, and I am so sorry that you have to feel this way. You don't deserve that from your parents, no parent should ever do this mental terror on their children.. I really miss you, words can't describe how much I actually miss you.. And my heart still beats for you rapidly, I love you so much Salma, and I want you to know baby, when I said I will never give up on you I was telling the truth, everything ive ever said to you was honest and truthful, i dont have any reason to lie to you. I will not give up on you. I will repeat myself, it does not matter what life throws at us, I will be always by your side, and support you and love you through everything. There is no one better for me out there, and you know that, we both know that we cannot live without each other, what you gave me in this short period of time no one could ever do this to me, its only you, only you are in my head, i dont want anyone else, if i could trade off everything in my life, I would do it without hesitation. I know that youre in despair, and broken, i can feel it inside me, and it hurts me so badly that the love of my life feels this way. I trust both of us, I trust you that you love me enough that we can get through this, together. You might not see an option now, and its understandable. I'm just completely trusting in our love and connection. But I know we'll be fine, and as soon as this is over, I can continue treating you the way I did my princess. Please, believe in us, this isn't the end Salma, and we both know it. I love you so much baby, and I can't wait to talk to you again every day, and continue making you the happiest girl on earth. We also have people who supports us, really good people, we must believe in them too, theyre sending prayers for us. I'm trying to stay as positive as possible, since we're connected i think its possible that you feel what i feel, so I'm trying to make it easier for you, I hope you can feel it, and feel the love even though I can't talk and text you right now. I miss you so much Salma and I love you so much. If you're reading this that means you let my sister help us, that means a lot to me, please don't give up Salma, you're a strong girl, I believe in you.

Please believe in yourself, and us as well. Not God, neither humans can seperate the ones who love each other deeply, there's always a way, there's nothing thats impossible for love. I love you Salma, my wife, my everything.

Hi baby.. I can only imagine how you are feeling right now.. I know this is so hard, and for me as well, maybe this is the most difficult thing in my life yet, being seperated from you once again.. My soul and heart aches for you more and more and more every single hour, i really cant live without you.. I miss you so terribly that I can't even think straight anymore, I want to be with you so badly that I could cry, but I know that I can't cry.. Not yet.. I have to stay strong for my pretty princess so its a bit easier for you, I mean it in a spiritual way only your soul can feel.. I have to be patient, I have to keep being positive, I will never lose my faith in you, I trust you with my whole soul, my soul trusts you that you will reach out soon, really soon.. I love you so much baby there's nothing I enjoy doing while knowing that we have to go through this.. I look at this like a trial from God, if we really do deserve each other, if we really are meant to be together, deep down I already know the answer, that you're my other half, my most precious blessing in my life, my everything, but it is really hard to wait when your soul aches for your other halfs presence.. I love you so so so so much, i miss you terribly.. I love you Salma, youre my everything.. It's a bit weird but I can genuinely feel you, like you're touching me and sometimes I hear your voice in my head answering to me.. I might've gone schizo from how much I miss you, but I believe that this is thanks to our deep connection between us, I love you.. I love you so much.. I'll be here waiting, my precious angel.. Come through soon, please..

Salma I miss you so much.. It's like my soul and heart is missing a piece you completed and I just can't do anything anymore with a smile on my face.. I think about you all day, about how much I love you and miss you, and how we're going to get through this together, but sometimes the sadness just gets too overwhelming and I really can't go on without you.. Nothing makes sense, I barely eat, I barely laugh, I have the urge to cry hour.. My soul aches for your presence, and your voice and love.. I still believe that we're meant to be together, I love you so much, I believe and have trust in us.. You make my days brighter, with you everything is more vibrant, your smile shines lighter than a thousand stars combined, your laugh is my favorite melody, your voice is so calming and I could listen to you speak 24/7, you make my storms calmer, and more lighter, with you, everything just makes sense.. You are my one, my only one, who can make me feel this loved.. If I had to choose between my last breath or never loving you again, I would use my last breath to tell you that I love you so much, with a smile on my face, because I rather take my last breath, than to live in a world where You doesn't exist in my life.. I believe you feel the same way, no.. I feel it you feel the same way, no one of us knows how much longer we can go on without each other, the feeling of missing you is so terribly strong I could cry rivers.. I want to hug you so badly and kiss your forehead and tell you that everything is going to be fine, that we'll be fine, rub your back and pat your head until you fall asleep in my arms, and until you feel the safest.. I know you don't sleep much, and it pains me so much that you must be so exhausted by this point and I can't do anything to ease your pain.. I want to kiss you so badly and make you feel so loved that you forget every painful moment youve ever had in your life, I want to give you everything I have in me, support you through good and bad, love you every single second of every day, and even in the afterlife, I would spend my entire existence searching for you again, but I dont think I would need to search for long, because I love you so deeply and I feel so connected to your soul that even I do not know sometimes If its me feeling a certain way, or you.. It is weird but not in a bad way, because your soul is beautiful and it doesnt deserve this seperation its going through, neither of us do. I hope when I imagine that I hug you and kiss your forehead to make you feel safe so you know its going to be okay, you can feel my warmth that I want to give you.. I love you so much baby and I cant repeat myself enough on that, I love you so much and I belong to you for the rest of my existance.. You're the one I can call Home, where I feel safe and loved, appreciated, where I feel like I'm enough and where they love me for who I am, thats you Salma, you're the one I can call home, ive every reason to.. I love you so much, I'm waiting for you, I miss you terribly.. Speak to you soon, Salma, don't keep our souls waiting for long. I love you

Hi baby.. I slept 2-3 hours total today, I feel like I'm going to throw up.. I woke up at 23 yesterday because I had a good feeling that you will reach out today, and haven't really got a shut eye since. I was so positive that youre going to text today and it just makes me sad so much that you did not, but I still have this feeling that you will and you want to talk to me so badly, I feel the same.. I texted my boss if I could stay home today because it's legit impossible for me to work today with this much amount of sleep, so I had to lie and I said that i messed up my stomach and I threw up and I barely slept, which is true. I miss you so much Salma, nothing makes sense without you.. I'll try to get some shut eye when my boss answers me, or if she demands I have to go in :D.. Anyways, I love you so much, and I can't wait to talk to you again, play with again, laugh with again, and just be with you again, including everything, I miss you so much Salma and I'm here still, waiting for the love of my life

I managed to sleep for a bit because I felt like you were next to me.. These days without you and being seperated already feels like an eternity and the feeling of missing you is so strong that I feel sick.. You are on my mind for the whole day and I miss you so terribly I could cry rivers again.. We both barely sleep and eat, I don't want you to get sick because of this, come home soon Salma, our souls aches for each other.. I love you so much, you're the girl of my life, and this little seperation is not going to change anything inside of me, it just pains me to my core that I can't hear your voice and talk to you, I want to love you but I can only give you the feeling of love through our connection and I hope you can feel it.. You're my everything and every passing second without you feels like torture, I want to speak to you so badly.. I love you, I love you so much Salma, and this will never change.. Sleep well, my precious princess

I saw you played a Ranked game after 3 days, I'm happy that you had energy and power to sit down and play, you also did so well, I'm so proud of you. Ive also played but I genuinely can't enjoy anything because I feel so sad.. When I play there is not one round where I dont think about you, and the feeling of missing you is so draining and painful at this point that I can't even concentrate on anything I'm doing.. I love you so much... I want to hear your voice so badly I want to hear that cute laugh of yours again, and you calling me pretty boy and baby is the most sweetest things my ears could wish for, your whole existence is a wish come true for my soul, i love you so much.. I pray that you get the courage to message me tonight, so we can build towards a solution about this situation and be happy once again, because I dont think I will ever be happy in my life if I lose you as well.. But I don't think thats the case because I know that you're the love of my life, the one made for me, a match in heaven, my everything, the other half of my soul, you fill in the missing pieces, youre everything that I could wish for, the best thing that can ever happen in my life, I can't love anyone else like I love you, and its so painful that I can't be with you now.. I miss you so much Salma..

Hi baby. I woke up crying like a baby this morning lmao, it felt like I was with you again and reality hit too heavy. But I've been feeling good, and i can't explain it but, it's like my soul knows something that I don't, and you're such a strong girl and I'm so proud of you, I believe in you, you're amazing. I feel like you will text me soon and everything will be good again, I know you don't really know what to say to me yet when you build up enough courage to reach out to me, but don't worry, I love you so much and it does not matter if you can't find the words or don't know what to say, we'll figure it out, together. I love you so much baby, it feels a bit lonely texting you like this but at least I feel like I am texting you, none the less at least I have this at the moment. I'm waiting for you baby, don't let your good boy wait much longer because you're strong and you can do it! Believe in us, in our bond, in our love that many people don't have and never experience in this world. You mean everything to me, I love you, and I miss you. Talk to you soon

Hi my love, I hope you saw my new message on my profile for you, I saw your banner as well.. And it made me worried because that song is about double suicide, but I think you meant the true meaning of that song, that you will love me till the day you die, and I feel the same, you're my everything and my love grows stronger and stronger for you each day. Honestly, being seperated from you is really like I've been living in hell, nothing makes sense without you.. I try my best to stay positive, and just be as happy as I can be until you return, but its kinda draining to force out happiness when you're not really happy.. But my positivity never leaves me, even when I become overwhelmed with sadness by your missing presence, I'm positive that this is just an obstacle, that we'll get through together, because true love always wins in the end, and you will be the end of my story, forever, I will love you until the deep cosmos tears away my mind. I know you feel really sad now, and I'm so proud of you for trying to gain strenght and courage to reach out to me, so this situation becomes a tad bit easier. But I have to be patient, you might not even know what to say to me when you do, but it's all right, we'll figure it out together. Nothing makes sense without you Salma, it really doesn't. I love you so much, you make my world more vibrant, it becomes more vibrant just by thinking of you, you are the calm in my storms, youre the person I can call home, you are worth every single drop of pain if it means I get to be with you for the rest of my life, because I wouldn't want it any other way, you shine brighter than a thousand stars combined, your smile is the most prettiest thing I've ever seen in my life. I could say about that your face as well, but even your whole existence, you as a whole is the most beautiful thing that ever exists, you make me feel ways I didn't know it was possible for me to feel ever again, safe, heard, and deeply loved. You're worth everything Salma, I'm trying my best for you, I have no reason to leave you behind in this cruel world, I'll be here for you and support you, love you, and be by your side, I love you so much, my words cant describe how much. I never knew it's possible to miss a person as much as I miss you, my soul aches for you every minute of the day.. I know we will be together again soon, because our souls and heart never left each other. I love you and miss you deeply. I also have some really good clips to show you, some of them are not long just a good shot and dying after or something like that but I think you would like it. I also see that you're playing with your friend, I'm happy that you can get up from your bed, even though you probably can't get your mind off of me, it might help you relax a bit. Keep going a bit more, pretty girl, you're so strong and I believe in us, we got this, I love you!

Hi baby.. I woke up feeling sick again, I didn't go to work, I dont think im going to work either this week anymore. Yesterday I had a strong sense that you would text, it was a really strong sense.. And yet my favorite notification didn't go through.. I feel devastated YET I'm so proud of my pretty girl, I know you're trying your best but you are scared of a few things. Especially about what you should say to me, but it's okay, you don't have to know, we'll figure it out when you reach out to me, so you don't have to be scared about what you should type, a "hi baby" would make me cry in joy, and we would go on after that, you don't have to be perfect for me, you dont have to always text me in long answers or openers. I miss you so much Salma and my love for you is neverending, I'm not giving up. Remember the things I put out on my discord for you; When fear speaks loudly, listen to my faith in you. And Borrow my strenght until yours return. I love you. I know you were so close to reaching out, I felt it, I felt that you were so close to me, and then nothing happened, the closeness stayed, but your notification didn't pop.. This will be the 7th day without the love of my life, unfairly seperated, and yet my love still grows stronger for you. I'm here, waiting for you my Queen, I belong to you. I love you so much Salma, words can't describe it. Keep it up, my good girl, I'm so proud of you and I know you can do it, I believe in you!

Hi baby, I could sleep longer today since I didn't go to work because I was feeling sick, but you know that. I hope you got some rest today as well, and have eaten. I love you so much, and I miss you terribly, I want to play with you again, I want to talk to you again, to laugh with again, to gives kisses to again, to write cute messages again while youre asleep, to make you feel safe, to make you happy, to erase your bad thoughts, to give you all my love that is in me, to chill with in my bed.. We still haven't watched anime together, we haven't played anything else together, but I know our time to do that is really soon, I miss you so much baby and you mean the world to me, youre the one who gives sense to everything in this cruel world, and I couldn't be more happy and lucky to love a woman like you, I will never give up on you. If you cant stand, I will help you stand, if you dont have strenght, borrow mine, if your fears speak louder, listen to my faith, if anything, I'm here for you. I will always love you for who you are and I will never let your hand go off of mine, I will stand beside you in every storm that comes, in every hardship, I will always choose you without a question, you're my only one forever, I want to give you everything ive got, you deserve all of me, youre such a strong girl and I'm so proud of you. Keep going my pretty girl, one last push and we'll be back together, forever, until our last breath. I love you so much my words can't describe. I love you so much.

Oh, I found something on insta that literally describes my feelings towards you, I know you can't see it now but I've sent it to you. I also sent a lot of other stuff because it made me think of you, but I already think of you all the time so anyways, I love you so much baby, I know you can do it, if you have fear borrow my strenght and faith. I love you so much

Hi my love. I just wanted to tell you how proud I am of you again, and I love you so much. Your anger is valid towards your parents, and I know you fear your own father.. And I am so sorry you have to fear him, this is not how its supposed to be, and it makes me sick to my stomach that he made you feel this much fear just because YOU LOVE someone.. It's an understatement when I say it's making me angry, but I am patient and I have faith in you, my soul knows things that I do not yet. I don't know if I should also pre-prepare a text for you when you do reach out to me, because I don't know if I'll be able to find words whilst im crying out of pure joy and happiness that I get to talk to you again, so I might have to prepare something, just like you. You're the best thing happened in my life, the first best thing is I get to love you, and the second is that I found you, I am actually the luckiest alive because even when we're apart, I feel your love and even in the darkest days in this hell I get to feel safe, and thank you for not giving up, thank you for still loving me and trying your best to overcome your fear, I believe in you so much I can't even explain it to you, I'll never give up on you, I'm holding your hands every day and supporting you and I know you can feel me, your soul can feel me. I love you so much, keep pushing a bit more baby youre my precious angel and you make me feel like I'm in heaven, it does not make sense living without you, I don't think I would be able to, you mean everything to me, I'm still here, supporting you, loving you, and waiting, and I'll do all of these today, tomorrow, the day after, and I could go on. I love you and miss you so much, I'll be here my love, I'm not going anywhere. I hope to talk to you soon.

Good morning baby. I hope you could sleep some, I love you so much and your missing presence is getting harder to bear. I don't know what is going through your head that you changed back your profile to almost identical when I met you, but I don't think its because you're over me and forgotten me, my heart says its the exact opposite, because why would you set a picture of yourself especially one that you made for me.. I really hope that soon, I mean really soon, you build up the courage and strength needed to send me that message, and I know you can do it, I love you so much, and love always prevails over anything, especially a love like ours, and I'm blessed that I can love someone as much as I love you, its just so hard to go on or do anything without you.. And I miss you.. You mean everything to me and you matter the most, I want a future with full of laughs, love, dancing in the rain or the kitchen, I want every memory of mine with you, even though a lifetime wouldn't be enough for me to love you, I would search for you every lifetime, every place that I go to after my last breath, and I would find you because I would never give up searching for you. If it was a random love story You and I wouldn't be feeling this way, the feeling of missing and loving you would've faded a few days later, but it haven't gone anywhere, it just gotten stronger and stronger, I can't imagine my life without you anymore, I don't even want to.. I'm not going to give up on you, I'm your number one fan, your supporter, your lover, I'll do my best to make you the happiest girl alive. I'm waiting for your text Salma, I love you so much

Hi baby, I miss you so much, my soul really aches for your presence. I love you so much I can't put it in words, and I know you're scared and it's okay, we'll figure it out together, I'll never let go of your hands Salma, you mean the world to me and you would make me the happiest man alive if you would text me soon, I wanna be with you.. I wanna play with you again, I want to hear your voice again, I want to hear your laugh again, I want to be silly with you again, I want to do everything with you and not being able to is making me so sad, but the thought of you brings me so much joy and it makes me strong, but when reality hits that we can not talk right now, it's so saddening, but I'm a 100% positive that you will come back to me, because you're my other half, and you will find the strength and courage to do so, my whole family is supporting us and praying, that everything will be alright. I can't even talk to you but my love only deepens for you, and it's a bit scary but I feel so lucky to love you, and I'll never let you go Salma, I'll hold your hands and love you in good and bad, in stroms or calms, when you don't feel strong enough I will let you take my strength and help you through everything, you really mean the world to me and it doesn't make sense without you, this world is black and white without you being in it. You make my world more vibrant, colorful, and it seems like its full of life, You make me feel like I'm full of life, everything makes sense, even the bad things couldn't stop me from anything, loving you is what my soul choose, not me, from the start I've met you, my soul already knew you, and it surely did, because you make me feels ways i've never felt before, and youre my sunshine, my angel, my future wife, my only one love, I belong to you, for eternity. I love you so much Salma and I'm waiting for you, my love, I know you can do it, you're strong, you're amazing, you're the best, i'm your number one fan, and I know we will get through this, soon, really soon we will be together again, laughing, and me loving you to the point that you can't stop smiling, I really want to hug you right now and just hold you tightly but gently until you fall asleep in my arms and you feel the safest in my arms, I would rub your back, pat your head gently, give you forehead kisses, and just take care of you forever. We would watch the night sky, but the moon would be jealous of you because you make the darkness more bright, the stars would feel less beautiful, because you are the most beautiful angel I've ever seen, I would make sure that you feel loved and safe every day, I would love you so much i might actually think that I would be annoying you, I would give you so much kisses until you melt, give you massages, rub your tummy when youre on your period, make sure that you feel as comfortable as possible, play with your hair, make food with you, eat with you, watch movies and shows with you, I want to do everything with you in this life, and even after, when we reunite in heaven, we would continue loving each other, because an eternity wouldn't be enough to be with you and love you. I'm actually so deeply in love with you and I wouldn't want it any other way, I know its painful that we're going through this, and it'll leave scars. But I'll kiss all the scars on you and still think that you're beautiful, because I love you for you, and it will never change, my love will only grow and deepen for you, my soul wants you so badly.. I love you so much Salma, and I'm waiting for you, you'll get through soon because I know that love always finds a way, and you're amazing, my angel, my only one

Hi baby.. I don't know what to type in these notes anymore for you, I've been almost repeating myself for 10 days straight.. I just miss you so much and I crave your presence.. Your voice, your laugh, your text, your jokes, your cuteness, everything.. My soul is aching so hard because we're seperated, and the only thing my soul wants is you, I mean, we have the connection, we just cant talk, but that aches it enough so that i feel like im in agony. I'm trying my best for you so you feel a bit better, and I hope its working. You mean the world to me, and you're my everything, I love you so deeply and feel connected to you that it's a bit scary but I'm getting used to it, I'm never letting you go Salma, not in a million years, I know we can get through this, trust in us baby, be brave, you, yourself know that you can do it. Just one message, and we can figure it out, we have help, lots of help. More brains are better to figure something out, especially if one brain knows what we're going thru, and that is my sister. Same thing with her fiancee, dad is a jork, seperated for 2 weeks. Please Salma, let them help us. I love you so much Salma, I love you so much.

Hi Salma, my everything. I feel like I should write this even though it's probably just me, repeating himself, but it doesn't matter. You are everything in my life, my joy, my calm, my happy place, you feel like home, even though we're apart, I can feel you touching my soul and heart every day, and I fall more deeply in love with you despite us being seperated. You actually don't know how much you mean to me, but if one day the moon whispers your name, it will be because I talked to her about you every night, and the moon is probably jealous of you, because you light up the darkness more, and I don't need no light to see you shine, you shine even in complete darkness, you're my light at the end of a tunnel, you're more beautiful, more amazing than a starry night, you're the definition of perfection. I love you so much I can't put it into words, and you make me feel like I can do anything, and everything makes sense, you make me feel so powerful, you make me so calm, I have no bad thoughts when I'm with you, what you do to me is amazing and it's like magic, you're magical. And I'm so proud of you my pretty girl, you're strong, brave, amazing, and the sweetest to exist in this world. I would do anything for you, when I'm with you I feel like I can move mountains, and I would move mountains to be with you, to make you happy, I wouldn't let you feel sad whenever you're with me, I want to make you the happiest girl alive, and I feel so lucky to love you this deeply, I wasn't even searching for someone to love, you just came and we recognized each other, and I don't want it any other way than eternity. I know you can do it, you're such a strong girl, I believe in you, I have my full faith in you, because I feel deep inside just how badly you want to text me again, and be with me again, and I feel the same way, I really want to be with you again, and this feeling will not pass, not this lifetime, nor the next. I will search in every lifetime for you, and I would walk this same path again if it meant that I get to be with you, I would do it even though it would be painful, but you're worth everything to me. I love you so much Salma, my heart belongs to you and every heartbeat is for you, and this feeling will never pass, I love you too much and you are my precious angel. My sweet home, my precious future wife, my calm in the storm, my love, my everything. I can't even find the words anymore to describe it, but I know you can feel it, I want to hug you so badly right now and hold you tightly and just tell you that everything will be okay, pat your head and give you kisses and talk to you more about how are we going to get through this, how I will stand beside you in every hardship, and give you all of my love that exists inside me, and for you it would never run out, even in the silence I feel your warmth and your love, and it makes me feel at ease, and you make the wait worth, and I'll keep waiting for my pretty girl, because I just know that you'll be back soon, you're my precious pretty angel afterall, and even in 10 days of silence, you still mean everything to me, and I feel the same way for you, or more. I'm so positive that we'll get through this, just don't give up, my love. Trust in us, and trust in our bond, that invisible thread that connects us, and everything will be fine. And you don't have to be scared by my reaction, I would cry tears of joy if you texted me and I could read your messages again, I would be the happiest man alive, I would jump around like a little child out of joy, I really can't describe it how happy I would be, and we would figure out the rest, and we have help from people to help us figure this out, as I said, my sister went thru the same with her fiancee, and she would gladly help, because she knows how much I actually love you and how much you mean to me. I can't wait for the day where I can hear your voice, laughter, your kisses, you getting flustered over things I say, your cute way of speaking, playing with you, and waiting for my end of the day to be with you, I really really love you so much. Text me soon, okay? I trust you and I love you so much. Take care until then Salma, I love you so much.

Hi baby, this is my 3rd message today because I feel like I should write again. It pains me that I don't know how you are, and what are you up to, but I know that you have no mood for anything, and you just feel like laying down. You probably can't really focus on your studys, and probably don't feel like gaming. I feel the same my love, I can't focus on any game I play, I can't focus when I'm writing code, you're in my head constantly and the feeling of missing you pains my soul. I love you so much Salma and I want to be with you so badly.. You're my everything and I know that you will pull through soon and send that message to me that you've been writing, and I know you're scared and I'm sorry.. I should have never agreed to the collab baby we would still be laughing together and talking, im so sorry i agreed, im so sorry i made you feel scared and that this happened, i was just so happy to collab with you i didnt even think about your cousin snitching on you to your dad.. I'm terribly sorry.. I want to make you the happiest girl alive but I can't do that if you close doors out of fear Salma, I'm trying my best even now, after 10 days to keep you protected and loved, so you feel safe enough to reach out to me.. You're my everything.. I want to play with you again so badly that I don't even enjoy the game anymore, it just doesn't feel the same. When I'm writing code I can't even focus because all I can focus on is you, how much I love you, and how positive I am that we will get through this together, I'll keep holding your hands even after you come back to me, I know you can do it baby, you're stronger than you realize, I crave your voice so badly, I just wanna hear you speak to me again, I want to hear your laugh again, you calling me cute nicknames and saying cute stuff, I want all of you, I miss you so much... I really miss you so much... And I'm sorry... I'm sorry that my decision is the reason that we're in this state... I love you so much Salma and it will never change, my soul wants you by my side so badly again, but we need no words to know how much we actually love and miss each other, me and you, can feel it. I'm waiting for your text pretty girl, my precious angel, my good girl who's strong and brave, but has to be a tiny bit more braver. I'm really waiting for you, I love you so much, I love you.

Good morning baby, I've managed to sleep like 2 hours.. I hope that you took care of yourself the night, and now you're resting. You need to rest so you can get enough courage and strength to send me the message you've been writing for the past days. I know you can do it, you're my good girl afterall, and you're stronger and braver than you think, I love you so much Salma, I trust in us and I know we can do it together, I've never let go of your hands and I know it makes you feel a bit at ease, I want to hug you so badly and tell you that everything will be okay, that we will be okay, and we can talk soon again, and continue where we left off, making each other the happiest beings in the universe, one lifetime wouldn't be enough to love you and give you the love you deserve, but I'm trying my best for you, and I know you're trying your best as well. I don't need a perfect version of you, I want you with all your flaws, scars, everything, I love you for you, and nothing can change that, not a bit of distance, not the silence, and not God, no one can change that. I love you so much Salma and I know you can do it, you're so close to actually doing it and getting through, I can feel it. I'm really looking forward to playing with you again, laughing with you again, smiling non-stop because you make me that happy with only your presence, writing cute texts while you're asleep, calling you my pretty girl and good girl, you're perfect for me just the way you are, and I love you so much. I feel so lucky to love someone like you, and I'm blessed with you, I'm never letting you go, I have no reason to let you go. I want to spend forever with you, I could never get bored of you, I could be talking to you 24/7 and looking into your eyes 24/7 and I would never get bored, you're so beautiful and I love you so much, everything about you is perfect for me. I'm waiting for you, my love. I love you so much Salma, I love you so much.

Hi baby, I love you so much. I napped for like 4 hours and I still feel tired:( I would give anything to hug you right now and hold you tightly to me and tell you that everything is going to be okay, that we'll be okay, so you need not to worry, I'm not going anywhere, and I still love you, and I love you more deeply each passing day, and I don't think anything can change that. I love you so much Salma, you're my peace, my heaven, my everything, you give sense to the chaos, and you make the world feel more vibrant, and safer. You make it more vibrant just by being in it, I could not ask for anything else better but you, because in this world, there's no one else better for me than you, you're my other half, my moon, my sun, my wife. I love you so deeply I can't even find the words sometimes, yet I feel like it's mandatory for me to write these love letters for you. I can't wait for the days when I wake up next to you, when I can make you breakfast in bed, making your favorite, making you feel safe while you fall asleep in my arms and I whisper sweet nothings into your ears, to take care of you, dance in the rain with you, make you the happiest girl alive, you deserve everything that I have to offer, I could never love someone like the way I love you. You're different, different in a way that I look at other people, it feels like I've been searching for you all my life, and finally found you. I know your text will come through soon, because you're stronger, and braver than you think, and love always finds a way, it always does. And I will never give up on you, I'll hold your hands in good and bad, be it anything, you'll never have to face it alone. You don't have to face anything alone, I love you so much Salma, and it'll never change, my love for you can never run out, its infinite, just like I want us to be infinite and search for you every lifetime. You're my precious angel and I would do anything to protect you, I know you will get through soon, just a little push, I'm here, waiting, and I'm not going anywhere. I love you so much and I cant wait to hear that sweet voice of yours, that cute laugh, to play with the best valorant player ive ever played with, to watch anime with you, to text you all day, to say good morning and good night every day again, to tease you, to give you kisses, to talk to you, I really can't wait to do everything again with you. I would be the happiest guy alive if you were here now, I would jump around out of joy like a child when they recieve a present, be as happy when they get ice cream from the ice cream truck, I would be like careless child just happy jumping around, and I would probably cry out of joy as well. I'm waiting for you Salma, I love you so so so so much

Hi baby.. I miss you really much, my soul is aching for your presence more and more each day that passes.. I saw you finally got up from bed and played some valorant, and you did so well, im proud of you, you're the best. But I overthinked a bit that you played with others from where we met, but I know its no biggie, because you love me, and I love you, and you don't really have anyone to vent to. I really hope that you find the bravery and strength to reach out soon, because I want to continue loving you every day until death tears us apart, but even after then I would search for you in heaven or in my next life, and continue there. You're my everything and I don't want it to be anyone else, I can't love anyone else like I love you, I can't look at anyone else like I look at you, you're my everything, my world, my only one. You're so precious to me and I would do anything to talk to you again.. My love for you did not fade away not even slightly, it just grows more and more, and it pains me so much that I can't do anything.. And I'm getting pretty tired, not of the waiting, not of you, not of the silence. Its just like my soul and heart is pained and its tiring to stay strong, but I have to be, so you can be strong as well, you're my pretty girl, my precious angel, I love you so much Salma, I say it everyday in my head at least a 1000 times if not more.. I love you so much and its so sad that I can't directly tell you at the moment.. I hope that you'll come back home soon, I'm waiting for you, and I'll be waiting for you, I'm not going anywhere, I'll keep loving you. Come home soon baby, I miss you so much and I love you

Hi baby.. This is the 13th day, and I hope the wait is over soon, because I miss you terribly, and I want to continue giving all of my love to you. I want to hear your voice again so badly, your voice makes me so calm but excited at the same time, I love your voice. I want to play with you again, you're so good at everything you do, and gaming doesn't feel the same without you. I want to text with you again, I love reading your cute texts and I love how you can make me feel your love even through it. I love it when you give me butterflies, and I love giving you butterflies as well, just the thought of you gives me butterflies. I love your eyes, they're so captivating and if I had to stare into them for the rest of my life, I would not get bored for a second, your eyes are gorgeous. I love your lips, I could kiss them all day and never get tired of it. Your hair is magnificent, it suits you so well and you look adorable and gorgeous. Your face is so pretty my eyes can't even believe it, you're so beautiful, I could not get bored of you even if I tried. Your whole existence is amazing, and I'm so lucky to love someone like you. My eyes are only for you, my heart and soul belongs to you. You're the first person to make me this happy, and even in the silence I can feel your love, and i'd choose you over any noise. You being with me just gives sense to everything, this cruel world doesn't seem so cruel anymore, colors are more vibrant, even the small things I've never really paid attention to seem beautiful. Life is beautiful with you, and I would not want it any other way, just with You. I love you so much Salma that sometimes I don't even know where to put this much love while we can't speak, but I hope you can feel my love for you every single day while we're apart. I keep telling everyone that I am taken, and my heart is only for my princess, because it feels like you've never left my side, and its true, I feel your hands in mine, and I hope you can feel mine in yours. My soul aches for your presence more and more but I'm still positive and I'm not giving up, I'm not letting you go, I'll keep waiting, because I know that you will reach out, because this bond we have is really rare, and I could not forget you even if I tried, I could not stop loving you even if I forced myself to. You're the best thing that happened in my life, and even though we have to go through a hard time like this, this early, and still not giving up just shows that we're meant to be. If it was any other relationship Me and You both wouldve forgotten each other in less than a week, but our minds still are about each other, non-stop. I can not stop thinking about you, about how much I love you and miss you, and I know we're going to be okay, I know we can do it, you're stronger and braver than you think, just a little push and it would be so much easier for the both of us, I don't want you to suffer without me anymore, and I'm suffering as well, but we could ease up on the pain if you were actually with me, not just in soul, but actually speaking to each other. This 13 days felt like I was living in Hell, but the thought of you and the feeling that you still love me so deeply made it bearable, I miss you so much. I really want to pull you in gently by your waist and hug you tightly until you feel safe and melt in my arms, I would kiss your forehead and pat your head and tell you that we're going to be okay and we can love each other again, I would give you everything I've got and I would never run out because a lifetime wouldn't be enough to give you all my love, and I'd do it all again, all the pain, all the losses, all the hardships, all the storms, I'd do everything all again if I knew you were waiting at the end, you are worth it, you are worth everything, to love you is the purpose of my whole existence, and you deserve all of it, I love you so much Salma. I love you so much. I love everything about you, genuinely everything. I don't think you could show me anything that I would not love about you, you're perfect for me, you're enough for me. I really hope that our reunion day is soon upon us, maybe today, or tomorrow, who knows? Maybe my soul does, but I hope it's really, really soon, so I can continue loving you. And it's actually crazy that I've fallen more deeply in love with you, even in the silence, you're magical, you're my precious angel, I love you so deeply I can't even explain. I'm waiting for you, my love; and I'm not going anywhere my pretty girl, forever yours. If you could see yourself thru my eyes, you would know how much you mean to me, and how amazing I think you are, you were made for me, and I was made for loving you. I promise you again, that I will never let go of your hands, let it be good or bad, you have my full support and I'll be here for you in any situation, and we'll face any challenge together, and with our unbreakable bond, and love, we can get through anything. You're the most precious person in my life, theres no other timeline, or life where I wouldn't choose you, You are the one my soul was always looking for. If someone told me that my memory will be wiped, but I get to keep one memory, it would be You, only You, and I would still be the happiest person alive, because it makes no sense to live in a world where I can not love You. You're the one I can call home, you're my calm and anchor in the storms, you make my world more vibrant, you are the light that shines through even the most darkest places and guides me thru it. I'll choose You now, tomorrow, 10 years later, forever, I would travel the Cosmic Sea to the end just to be with you, you're my everything, I want to take care of you, make you the happiest alive, love you for eternity, be there for you, dance in the kitchen, in the rain, buy you snacks, plushies, cuddle you, play with your hair, kiss you all day, wrap my arms around you and let you fall asleep in my arms while i rub your back, I wanna do everything with you. And the more I think, the more I realize, that without you this world isn't meant for me, I exist to love you, to give you my all. I can't wait to recieve my favorite notifications again, a notification, a voice, a person, You, who feel like home. I love you so much Salma and my feelings will never change for you. You don't have to do anything alone, you have me, I trust you, and I believe in you, you're the best thing that ever happened to me, I love you so much baby.. I can't imagine to be with anyone else but you, you're the one my soul and heart choosen, you basically stole it from me, and I'm glad you did, because I couldn't be more luckier. I hope this phase is over soon and we can continue where we left off, and heal each other from this nightmare, being seperated from you is like living in hell, but I can feel your soul touching mine, so it's a bit more bearable, but it's hard, really hard. Hard, because I know you're suffering as well, and I can't really do anything to ease your pain, it's just our souls and hearts speaking to each other, which we may not understand fully, but I do know that I feel you, I feel your love, that you're not willing to give up, but I also feel that you're hurting deeply, and we miss each other terribly.. Nothing feels the same without you, my love, even breathing is different without you, nothing is really enjoyable, I can't get you off my mind for 5 minutes, maybe I said too much with 5, I really hope we can be together again soon, and we can continue loving each other, I know you can do it Salma, you're stronger and braver than you think, I believe in you, I trust in you. And I know you trust and believe in me and us as well, and I know you're scared, it's okay to be scared, but you also know you're not alone in this because I've promised you that I'll never let go of your hands, and I'll be by your side no matter what. I love you so so so so much sometimes it pains me how much I love you and I can not really give it to you at the moment. I just wish and pray to God, that you overcome this fear, and reach out, because it would be much easier for the both of us, I pray that God lets you borrow my strength, that you find the courage. I know you're really close to it, and I'll keep believing and trusting you and cheering you until my last breath, you're my everything Salma and I love you so much. Come home soon, your pretty boy is waiting for you to give you all his love and kiss all your scars and tell you that you're beautiful and you're enough just the way you are. I love you so much baby, talk to you soon. I just feel like I need to keep going with this message, so I will. I can't even imagine my reaction when we meet IRL, I would probably be perma blushing and I would keep looking at you, my eyes probably wouldn't believe that such a beauty like you can exist in this world, I would be actually so flustered by your presence.. But I would hold your hand so you feel safe everywhere we go, and if we go to a place and you start feeling uncomfortable, or anytime you feel uncomfortable anywhere, we would leave without hesitation. There's a tropicarium in Budapest, I would definitely bring you there, it can get a bit crowded so I would hold your hands and not let go of it, I was there once btw and it was a cool experience. We could also go to CyberJump, its like a trampuline park, would be fun. And also there's Margit-Sziget (Margit Island), a great place for a picnic, but I've never been there so I would be a bit lost.. There's so much things I want to do with you when we get the chance to, so we can get great memories together, but honestly, even if we did nothing, and just layed in bed cuddling, that would also count as a great memory, anything we would do, even if its like small, you would make it extraordinary, even just looking at you would feel like that. You're so special to me I can't even really put it into words, its like, I know I've said it already, but it, rather you feel like you're the one I've been looking for, and I don't think it is our first time together, I think I found you in every life I had already, and I'm so blessed to be able to say this, you're a blessing to me, and I love you with everything I've got. You mean everything to me, Salma. I hope I can talk to you soon, I love you so much. Come home soon.. Please..

Hi my love, after yesterday's letter I don't really know if I can tell you anything new, but it just feels right to keep writing you these. But I would be more happy if I didn't have to write these in my notes, but directly to you. Anyways you probably read through all of them on this website that I've made for you out of pure love. It just feels like that I don't have to write these in my notes anymore, because I feel like you're coming home soon, and if you're reading this, that means you've already found your way back. and we're probably both crying as you read through everything. 15 days apart, well technically its still the 14th day, in 14 hours it will be the 15th. But it didn't really feel like 15 days, because I felt your soul next to mine every single day, and it was like you never left. What I learned in these 15 days, that You mean the whole world to me, and a world without You isn't meant for me. Every blood cell, every nerve, every vein, every bone in me loves you to its fullest capacity, and I will keep loving you until I lose my conscience in the Cosmic Sea. And even tho this might not be my last letter like this, I would be still happy to keep you writing these until my fingers bleed. I love You so much Salma, you're more than enough for me, I love you just the way you are. How could I look at any other girl, when you stole my sight? How could I love anyone else, when the sole purpose of my existence is to love You? And everytime I think of you, everytime I wake up, everytime I look at your picture, I fall more and more in love with you. When this is over, I want to introduce you to my Mom and sister, they're really praying and hoping for us, maybe I would've gone mad already without them, they helped me a lot, they will help us a lot in the future, they're really sweet people. My Mom just wants us to be happy and wants our suffering without each other to stop. She's the sweetest. But you're sweeter, my love, and I couldn't wish for anything else but You. You're my sunshine, the one who gives sense to everything, the one who makes me feel like I am alive. You're the most precious person in my life, you're worth every pain, every tear that dropped from my eyes, every sleepless night, every heartbeat, you're worth everything to me, and if I had to chance to revert time, and I would remember You, I would walk the same path again, with every pain, every loss, every tear, every hard time if it leads back to you, I would do it all again, without hesitation. There's nothing and no one in this world who can stop me from loving You and giving You everything I've got, because without you it doesn't make sense. You can always rely on me if things get hard, I'll never let go of your hands, I'll never stop being your number 1 fan, I'll never stop loving you, and I'll never ever give up on you. I believe in you my pretty girl, I trust you, and I'm so proud of you, you're so strong and you're amazing. I would choose you over and over again, every single day, every lifetime, I would choose You. If you'd ask me how many times you come to my mind, I would say once, because you never left it, you occupy my mind all day, you're my first thought when I wake up, and its just "I love you Salma" this is my very first thought every time I wake up, and it continues until I fall asleep, but even in my sleep I probably think about you, my pretty girl fully occupies my mind, and I love it, I don't really wanna think about anything else anyways. I played Valorant as well to try and relax and occupy my mind for a bit, but it never worked, all I was thinking about is you, I hit some nice clips though, can't wait to show them to you. I love you so much Salma, I can't say it enough that I love you so much, you're genuinely the best thing that ever happened to me. I love you so much, and it will never change, you're the love of my life, actually, probably the love I keep coming back to in every lifetime. I want to hug you so badly right now and look deeply in your eyes and get lost in them and tell you how much I love you and then kiss you until I can't think straight and hold you tightly and make you feel loved so deeply.. You really are everything to me. I love you so much. Since I know you'll be reading every single letter, I'm trying not to repeat myself too many times, but it's a bit hard to come up with new ways to tell you how much you mean to me, how much I miss you, and how much I love you. If you were here right now, I would be cuddling you and I would gently pat your head while you're resting your head on my chest, and I would keep holding you until you wake up, I might even fall asleep aswell. I really want to take care of you.. We would take a bath or shower together, I would wash your back, your hair, and after I would dry it and brush it, it would feel so amazing to take care of you, I would love every single second of it.. If I would happen to wake up earlier, I would cuddle you for who knows how long, and after I would get up while making sure I don't wake you up accidentaly, and I would make breakfast for you, and we would eat it together in bed, we could watch a video while doing that or something. I am the most blessed alive by being able to love you the way I do, I never knew I was capable of loving someone this much, I never knew I could be so obsessed with someone, but you showed me that I am very capable of it, and you taught me how to fly, because whenever I am with you, I feel like I am in Heaven, I love you so much my precious angel. I love you more than I can put into words, but if you were here, you would exactly know how much I do, but maybe your soul knows and feels it. Pouring my heart into these notes for you to read soon, and holding onto my faith that you can do it, trusting you and believing you, is genuinely the purest thing I can do at the moment, to love you this way. And I have to do it because if I don't put this love somewhere I would lowkey go insane, that is how much I love you, and I hope you can feel it even when you're reading this. I belong to you fully, my heart, my mind, my soul, all of me belongs to you, and I'm genuinely happy to belong to you, I couldn't be more blessed to be able to love you and give everything to you. You'll always have a hand to hold, arms to fall into when everything feels too heavy, my love for you is so pure and genuine I love you so much Salma, I love you so much. You mean the world to me. I really hope to hear your voice soon, and laugh with you again, play with you again, and do everything again with you. I love you so much. If this is my last letter before you come back, thanks for reading it love, I hope you didn't cry much while reading it. I love you so much Salma.

Hello baby. Well, the last one wasn't the last letter I've made for you. Sorry about that, I just need to speak my mind and feelings for you. I love you so much and you mean everything to me, and I trust you and believe in you. But for some reason everytime I see you play with someone from where we met, my mind just starts racing, and I don't know how to stop it.. It just keeps asking me questions, and I don't fucking know how to stop it.. I'm so angry at myself because I let myself overthink like this.. My fucking brain keeps asking me if you're looking for someone else, or are you over me, and I'm so fucking done with these thoughts, I just want to make it stop, I don't know why my brain does this when this happens.. Probably because my heart also start racing a bit when I see you online there.. And I don't know what to do to stop it.. I don't want to feel this way because I trust you and believe in you and I love you so much and I guess my heart just shrinks because others get to play with you but I don't.. I want to play with you again... I want to hear your voice... I could cry rivers now and I'm actually crying while typing this because I am so exhausted and I'm trying to be so strong for my pretty girl but I can't really keep it together when my mind fucks me over like this and my inner demons come out to make me fucking overthink everything, im so mad at myself, im in so much pain as im writing this.. I just want to be with you, is that really much to ask for? I've been consistently writing these notes for the past 15 days, 22 letters and counting, I've done so much for you to keep you feel loved, and I know you're scared and you have fear inside you, and I know you want to break free from it, and I support you fully and I believe in you and I love you so much.. But I don't know what to do anymore baby, not when my mind keeps overthinking every single detail even when I tell myself thats NOT the case, it just keeps doing it and no matter how much I try to ignore it, no matter how much I tell myself thats not the case, I fucking can't, I genuinely fucking can't.. The only one person who can make it stop is You, but we know the issue with that, I'm blocked. I'm sorry that you have to read through my pain, but I need to let it out. I'm so fucking devastated from your missing presence, every time I cry my chest hurts so much its like my soul is trying to keep itself together and it barely does. I've been patiently waiting for You for 15 days, consistently, not a single bad thought, just faith, trust, and love, and I'll keep doing it, because a world without you isn't meant for me. I'm just so lost.. I've made this website for you, I'm trying to be positive for you, genuinely waiting for you so much that I can't even sit still, nothing feels the same without you, not even breathing is the same.. I could paint the world in a crimson blaze if it meant that I can be with you right at this moment.. I'm so sorry for overthinking, I'm sorry for trying my best and still failing... I just don't know what to do anymore without you.. I'm trying to go on every single day with positivity, but some days I just fall apart, this is the second day in a row where I fall apart, and I'm so sorry.. I was genuinely in a good mood 5 hours earlier, and now I'm in this state.. When I overthink the same fucking questions come back, and I cant make it stop.. One of the most frequent questions in my head are; Are you trying to get over me? And I know it's not true because if you were trying I wouldnt feel you this close to me every single day. I know that you want to come back to me, I know you love me so much, I know you miss me terribly.. And even tho I know these, my mind can't fucking shut up.. Tell me, baby, how do I stop it? How can a fucking idiotic question get through the shouting of my heart and soul that says I love you so much, how can it take over me? I'm really this bad? And here comes the questions again.. I'm not even going to write it down.. Alright.. I'm sorry that this wasn't a love letter where I pour my love into it, it was more like "Hey, I'm not fine, even tho I show that" type letter.. I'm fighting so hard for you, my pretty girl, but sometimes I feel lost.. And if I actually put this letter on the website I made for you, I'm sorry that you had to read my suffering, when I should be staying strong for You. But alas I'm feeling better after letting it out from me, I love you so much Salma, and I miss you terribly and I know you playing is just trying to relax and you don't wanna do it alone because thats not going to give you strength. Despite everything, it's still you, I believe in you, I have my full faith in you, I love you so much, and I can't wait to hear your voice again, and make each other feel loved again.. I love you so much..

Day 16... I can't even find words to explain how much I miss you and crave your presence and voice.. It's like my chest hurts and I'm really trying to be positive but eventually I can run out of strength too.. I've been trying to be so strong for you over the past 16 days, I'm being faithful, loyal, I'm trusting you, believing you, loving you, but it's so hard to keep this up, missing you is genuinely almost tearing me apart inside, I want to hear your voice so badly, i want to love you so badly... Even though I feel like shit for the past 24 hours, I'm not giving up on you, I never will.. You're everything to me, you mean the world to me, and I'll keep waiting.. It's one of those days when words just doesn't come.. I just want to be happy next to you, is that too much to ask for? I know you're scared of your father, but this can't keep going forever baby, me and you are both suffering.. I want to hug you so badly and tell you that everything is going to be okay, i want to tell you that but I can not and it's making me miserable, I was managing so good for the past 16 days but eventually I run out of strength as well when everything gets too heavy.. And its really weighing on me right now, my mind is filled with you, about how badly I want to be with you and I love you so much, it's been on repeat since I woke up 12 hours ago, and it's making my heart so heavy.. Crying does not really help either, playing this shit game doesn't help either.. I can't turn off my mind, I can't relax all I think about is you.. I have no mood to do anything, I dont have apetite, I dont have any mood to do anything, but I can't lay in bed all day because that is not going to give you strength, but it's so hard for me to do anything while knowing that I can't directly talk to you.. And it's getting harder each day, but I'm not losing my hope and faith, I trust you and I believe in you.. I love you so much Salma, and you mean the world to me, you're everything that I was looking for, you're perfect for me, you're enough, I love you the way you are, You could show me everything that is bad about you and I would still love you and kiss every flaw of yours just so you know you're really enough the way you are, and I love you so much.. There's no one else in this world who could make me feel the way I feel about you, no soul in this existence could captivate me like yours did, you stole my heart, my soul, my sight, my mind, because every single cell in my body is crying for your presence.. Nothing is the same without you, it will never be, because you made the world more brighter, more vibrant, more colorful, you gave sense to things that didn't make sense, you're my calm, my joy, my life, you mean everything to me.. I want to show you this website really badly, to show you just how much you mean to me, how much I love you and care for you, that even in the silence I keep choosing you every single day, and I'd keep choosing you over any noise, and despite everything it's still you.. It's still you, if it wasn't you my soul would not be aching for you this badly.. Hell is living without you, Heaven is living with you, there's no in between, there never will be, because a world, where I can't love you just doesn't make sense and it is not meant for me. You ignited something in me that not even me, God, or anything can extenguish.. I love you so much Salma, I love you so much.. You feel like home, you're the person I will keep choosing over and over again, every single day, you're more beautiful than a field full of flowers, more beautiful than the Moon herself, and even the Moon is jealous of your beauty. You are the love of my life, everytime I hear your name I smile, everytime I look at you and smile, everytime I think about you I smile, I love you so much, but when reality hits that we're seperated in a way none of us wanted, it just breaks my heart.. I only pray to God to give you strength and courage, to take away your fears, I don't pray for anything else but You, I don't even care about anything else.. I just want you back, I want to hear your voice, write love letters while you're sleeping and to read your response after you wake up, I want to call you my pretty girl and my good girl again, I want to give you kisses, I want to make you blush and give you butterflies again, I want to text you first thing after I wake up and end every day with a good night and cute texts with you, I want to do everything with you again.. I miss you so much, terribly, it feels like agony.. I was made for loving you, and you were made for me, and I still can't really believe that I found the one, the one whom my soul was always looking for, and I'm so blessed to have found you, and I'm never letting you go, not tomorrow, not a month later, never, I'll keep loving you for an eternity.. I know that our love, this bond, can get through everything that life throws at us, I just know it no matter how much time would pass, I would still feel the same about you, and nothing would feel the same, no matter how much time passes, I would still crave your voice, everything.. There's not a day, not a single second of any day where I wouldn't choose you, where I wouldn't love you. You're my everything Salma.. And I believe in you, I trust in you, I know you can do it, you're stronger and braver than you think, just a little push and you'll be home with me.. I miss you terribly, and I'm waiting for you.. I love you so much Salma.. I love you so much..

I just finished my last letter like an hour ago, but I want to keep writing for you, but the thing is that I don't know what to write anymore, I just need to put this love somewhere, somewhere that you will feel soon, into words, into letters, that only you will read, and knowing that it makes me happy to write these. I was genuinely holding it together for 14 Days, well, that's what I tell myself, but deep down I wasn't, I really wasn't. But I don't think there's a single person on this planet, who could hold it together after everything. And honestly? In my opinion, it's all worth it, you're worth it. Every single tear that dropped from my eyes, every pain that I am feeling because of missing you and not being able to talk to you. You're worth it, and I'll keep doing it, because it doesn't make sense not to. My soul and heart knows that genuinely you're the love of my life, as I said, I wasn't even searching for love, my soul just recognized you, and you ignited something inside of me that nothing can extinguish, my soul chose to love you, and it'll never let go of you. I'm sad beyond words, there's no words to explain my sadness, and I also am scared a bit, but I choose faith, love, and hope every single morning, because I trust and believe you more than you know, but by the time you reach this part of my letters, you will exactly know how much I love you and just how important you are in my life. I'll keep choosing you, I'll keep loving you, I'll keep my faith in you, even on days where I can't hold myself together, and honestly, I think there will be more days to come like that, to test my faith and my love, but I am not going to break, I will never give up on you. You will always have a place, a person to come home to, and I hope you do soon. I'll hold your hands for eternity, and I'll never let go of them, you'll always have arms to rest in when the world feels too heavy, a listening ear that will listen so happily to anything you have to say, even if you don't say a word, your presence just brings me so much joy its unbelievable. After all these days, all of my love put into words because I can't show it otherwise. After everything, I keep choosing you, and I actually think that magic might be real, because there's no way a person does this to me. I never ever thought that I have this much love inside of me, never thought I would be so unbreakable for one person, yet you showed me that I am very capable of amazing things, and I am genuinely so in love with you and I am so thankful for you, it is a blessing that I can love a girl like you, and I wouldn't want it any other way. Love doesn't know any distance, and the silence doesn't scare it away, that is when you know it is real, and my love, this is very real. I never knew that love like this could exist, and we're genuinely lucky to love each other like this, because only a few people on this planet experience a love like this in their lifetime here. I'm blessed, I am really blessed. Thank you Salma, I love you so so so so much, you're the only one I can think about, there's no one else on my mind, and I am happy this way. And, you know, it's weird, because I don't really feel lonely, because I feel like you've never left, that this situation never occurred, and it's probably because our souls are still next to one another, and they're connected, hugging each other, but it gets heavy when reality hits, and reality hits both of us. There's nothing I wish for more than to hear your voice again, to play with you again, to text you again, to make you happy again, to make you laugh again, to make you the happiest girl again, and keep doing it for the rest of my life, for the rest of my existence. I love you so much it's genuinely unbelievable, and I've said it many times, but I really can't believe that I got to be so blessed to love someone like this. You're my world, my everything. You're more beautiful, more brighter, than the starry-night sky with a full Moon, you're my light in the dark, you light it up so much that there's no darkness left, I feel so warm, so loved by you, and I am so thankful for you for showing me that I don't have to be perfect, that it's enough to be myself.. No one has ever let me feel this way, I was always obligated to change, I never felt like I was enough.. But you? You showed me that is not the case, that you feel the same way as I do. I love you so much Salma, I'm so blessed and thankful. I actually don't know what to say anymore, I am genuinely just repeating myself every letter, but I don't really feel like that is an issue, because loving you is what I exist for, what I was created for. I hope you know just how much you matter to me, and how much I miss you, but I think you might have an idea. I want to tell you this again; No matter what life throws at us, be it good or bad, heavy or easy, distance or no distance, I'll never leave your side, never let go of your hands, I'll love you through everything, even when we have a hard time, I'll keep loving you because that is what you deserve, that is who I am. And I'm so terribly frustrated that you have to fear your own father, I can't even imagine how you're holding up.. You probably want to text me really badly, push through your fear and reach out and send me that message.. And I would be the happiest alive if you actually did that, and I believe in that you can do it, you're the most amazing girl I've ever met, there's no one more amazing than you on this planet, no one who's more pure, more loving, more sweet, more beautiful, there's no one on this planet who can be compared to you, and never will be. I trust in you, I believe in you, I know you are really close to actually doing it, but fear takes over every time you set your mind on it, and I know it's frustrating, I know it's low-key depressing, and it's okay, you're human, and you're enough just the way you are. I love you so much Salma, I really really love you so so so so much. I've been enjoying writing these letters to you, and I don't know the reason behind it, I was never the type of person to write these, to pour love into paragraphs that expand over 16 days, I'm so thankful you showed this side of me, and I'll keep doing it, because I feel like I've finally found the true myself beside you, I am so blessed to have you in my life and love you the way I do, and to receive it back is the other biggest blessing in my life, because I know how much you love me because my soul can feel it, even if I don't understand it in my mind, my soul knows better. I love you Salma, and I hope you come home to me soon, I love you so much.

Day 16th, 3rd letter. I came up with an idea this morning to my mom, and I've asked; What if you join a server that she's in, and you try to message her? She was more than happy to help, because she couldn't look at me how sad I was anymore, and she couldn't take it that this was the 3rd day in a row where I cried myself. And so we drafted a message, I helped in it, my sister helped in it. And when it actually got through, I felt something in me, but it wasn't fear, I can't explain it, but I can't stop smiling for some reason. I hope that you feel warmth, and make you feel safe enough that you can actually overcome your fear. I really hope so. My heart and soul is unusually calm even after we sent the message, it's just my brain trying to tell me stuff that isn't true, and all I know is that I love you so much and I hope this is really over soon, that this is a turning point. After all we've done, after all of our pain, I know we can get through this, and that this will mark a new chapter in our never-ending story. I love you so much Salma, you're my pretty princess, my precious angel, you mean everything to me, you're the love of my life, the one person my soul can not forget in every lifetime it enters, the one I keep searching for, even if my mind forgot you from another existence. I love you so much and I am so happy to love you I genuinely can't explain it. I'm also so thankful for my mom, and sister for helping me every single day, without them I couldn't held myself together like I did in these 16 Days. I would've never lost hope and faith in you anyways, but they helped with it being a bit easier to bear. I really, really hope that message helps you fight your way through the fear, and makes that little push that is needed for you. You're my everything, I love you so much Salma. But I have to write down what's on my mind as well, because I feel like if I let it out, it will make it stop. So, this might be a bit dark. So, what is on my mind after sending that message, while writing it was; What if you just don't care anymore? What if, you don't want help? What if you're genuinely don't want to do anything with me anymore, and I've done all this for nothing, and what if I will never be able to do this, because I couldn't love anyone else like I love you, I couldn't write letters for 16 Days consistently in the silence for anyone else, I couldn't think about anyone else for 18 hours straight while I'm awake, I couldn't look at anyone like the way I look at you, I couldn't be myself if it wasn't for you, and I just know that nothing would be the same anymore, the world would be black and white, forever. And that is what is on my mind after sending that message, but honestly my heart and soul is louder than that, I love you so much Salma, and I hope I get to talk to you soon, because you mean everything to me, and sending that message gave me so much more hope that you can actually overcome your fears, and that we can be together again to love each other, maybe even more deeply than before, because of what we've went through, and no one can ever break this bond between us. I love you so much baby, I love you so much. The past 16 Days, I've been doing nothing but thinking about you, trusting you, having my full faith in you, believing you, loving you, and honestly even though I get dark thoughts sometimes, I think I'm doing great at it, and I hope it gives you strength, and all I've done wasn't for nothing. You're everything I've ever wished for, you make me feel alive, you make me feel ways no one can ever make me feel, you're the biggest blessing in my life, and I will do anything to be with you, I will NEVER give up on you, and I'll be by your side for an eternity, and it sounds so comforting.. An eternity with you, where I can look into those gorgeous eyes that could steal the Moon's beauty, that sweet voice of yours that makes me feel things every time you speak, that pretty face of yours that makes me blush every time I look at it, you're genuinely perfect and more than enough for me. I'm actually just repeating myself here, but I can't wait to be with you again, it means everything to me. To just love you, without conditions, because what conditions could I set when I've been loving you in 16 Days of silence? And I feel like this is the purest, genuine thing a person in love can do. Love your other half even in the distance and silence, that's the most genuine way of love, and as my mom's message wrote it, it isn't worth throwing away because of your parents. I love you so much Salma, I love you and again, I hope you can get through that small gap that is needed with this little message that my mom and sister wrote for you. I'm grateful that I have a supporting family like this, and you belong into our family, so it's not just me who gets this kind of support, you're deeply loved here as well because they respect our relationship, and they both know it's real, my mom and sister both have the same type of love like we do, an eternal love. And they understand me so well about how I feel, and when I tell them how much it doesn't make sense without you, and a world where I can't love you isn't meant for me, and breathing is not the same without you, nothing is. They don't ask questions, they don't doubt me, they know it's real, because they feel the same way about their other half, and genuinely that reassurance, that support is what keeps me standing on my own 2 feet, and of course, our love and my faith in you, they help out a lot though. And I just feel really bad that you've got betrayed by your own cousin, snitching on you that you have someone.. I genuinely can not possibly know how it feels, but I have a gut feeling.. And it honestly makes my blood boil, that this is the 2nd time that someone is trying to ruin us, it's like God is setting up trials for us just to test how true is what we have, and I'm not going to break, I will never break. Okay, overthinking wants to start again, but my heart and soul is louder at the moment as I'm writing this. And I've been also up since yesterday 20 or 21, I don't remember, and it's 11:53 at the moment, so I've been up for a little while, so it's harder to keep my brain a bit quiet with this stuff, and also it's a bit harder to write from the exhaustion, but I love to write you these, so I'll keep going. I can't repeat myself enough about how good I'm feeling about the message that my mom sent to you, and I really think this is a turning point, a turning point where everything goes back to how it was, because honestly in these 16 Days it felt like you've never left, and it didn't even feel like 16 days. I love you so much, my pretty girl. If this is really my last letter this way before you've reached out to any of us, thanks for reading it, it means a lot. I poured my heart and love out in the most genuine way I could in the time we were separated, and I hope you can feel every ounce of love in every word I've said. Honestly it's been quite the experience, and I'm glad it's over, and I'm happy that we're back together. If you're reading this we're probably in a call right now, and we're probably both crying our eyes out, and if that's the case then be it, tears of joy are better than tears of sadness. Well, I'm out of words and energy for today, I hope the next letter I write doesn't have to be in my Notes, or google docs, but directly in your chat message tab. I love you so much Salma, I love you so much, welcome home, my pretty girl, I'm so proud of you.

Hi baby. This is my 4th letter to you on Day 16. I went to sleep around 14 yesterday, and I woke up at 21, I played a few games with my friend Raven, he was one of my teammates when I was in a team, and if you were also stalking my tracker, DVL fejmi was also one of my teammates, both are good guys. Then I went to sleep around 1 in the night, because I was feeling a bit down, and I woke up at 4, still feeling down. I was hoping to see a message from you, either on my mom's end or mine, but it didn't happen and it's okay, I know you will come through, I know you can do it, and I love you so much. Anyways, since then I ate and I've been playing a bit of Valorant, but all I can think about is you, how much I love you, and I miss you, and that I can't wait to be with you again, and love you the way you deserve it. I also made some changes to the website, I've added cherry blossom petals falling down slowly, this whole website is built around you, all I can think about is if you would love it this way, or that way, you know, I've never once thought about how I would like it, because it's all for you. This morning I was overthinking a bit, but I'm regaining control pretty fast, because my faith and love for you is much bigger than some random overthinking while my whole body knows it is not true, not even slightly. I like to open this website and just scroll through it. It amazes me that I actually wrote this much, for one person, even in silence, my love never stopped or wavered, the faith never disappeared, the hope never got less. It is you who showed me this side of myself, who's capable of loving someone this much, who's capable of caring about someone this much, it is only you who unlocked this side of me and I'm genuinely amazed by it, you really are doing magic on me, and I love every single second of it. There's no change in my feelings, no doubts, that I love you so much and I still can't explain it in words, even after 26 letters, I still can't find the correct words to explain just how much I actually love you, and I don't think words will be enough for it to show you, I could say like really silly things like bring down the Moon for you, because if I could, I would, if I could, I would bring down every star for you and tell you that none can compare for your beauty inside and out, none. You're genuinely the best thing that ever happened to my life, and you are worth everything that happened, I'll never stop loving you, I'll never let go of your hands, you'll always have someone you can rely on, someone who waits you to come home every single day, someone who wants nothing but to give you everything, that someone is Me, and I'm all in for you, nothing will change my mind. I really love writing these letters for you, and I hope you loved every single second of reading them, and since I can't explain just how much you matter, how much I love you, how much I miss you, I'm just repeating myself and I feel like I've been repeating myself for the past 26 letters, and in my opinion, it's okay. Maybe it's just my overthinking that doesn't want me to repeat itself, because I know telling you everything, that I love you so much a 100,000 times wouldn't feel enough. And so I love you so much Salma, I hope you come home soon. I love you so much, Salma.

Day 16th 5th letter, because I just love you so deeply each passing minute, hour, day. And I keep thinking how could I actually tell you how deeply I am in love with you? And I realize it's impossible, there's no words that could explain my love for you, not a single language on this planet has the words needed to describe it. Japanese is a really beautiful language, maybe that could come close to it, just because the way Japanese people speak is beautiful, the language is beautiful, but not as beautiful as you. I think only my touch to your skin could genuinely explain the love I feel for you, my fingers running through your body, and as our skin presses against each other, and kissing every part of your body, maybe then you would feel my bursting love for you.. It's literally impossible to explain I could only show it to you, with my body. But maybe I don't even need to explain it, because your soul already knows just how deeply in love I am with you. I love you so much Salma, I can't say it enough, I really can't, I can't stop myself from saying it and I don't even want to. You're the only person I have ever belonged to, you're my future that I can see so clearly. Us waking up next to each other, me admiring your sleepy face and messy hair as you wake up and I would still think that you're most beautiful girl in this world, us watching shows on the couch or bed and just cuddling, loving each other with no words needed to be spoken, playing video games next to each other, and if we played valorant just giving each other a kiss after every round and cheering on the other, or just teasing them, or something more intimate :p I would be the happiest human alive with you next to me, even if we did nothing, even if we did everything. No matter what, all that would matter to me is that the love of my every lifetime, whom my soul searches for in every universe, is next to me. I can't even describe it, I really can't and I know I've been mostly repeating myself for the 28th letter now, but I just can say it enough, I can't find the words I want to find to describe my feelings for you. I could compare it to things, like when a supernova happens, that how my soul felt like, when they recognized each other. Or that you swallowed my heart and mind and soul like a black hole and you made me completely yours. You stole my eyesight and nothing can compare to your beauty, you stole my mind because anything that is in it is about you, my heart keeps on beating for you, every single beat, and I couldn't be more luckier that you did, I'm so blessed that you have "ruined" me. I want you so badly, in every way possible. I love every single version or you, even the ones you haven't showed me yet, and I will keep loving you no matter what, no matter what I'll always give you a 100% of my love, when I can and you need it I'll give 150%, hell, even 250%. I'll give you everything I have in me, because you are worthy of all of it, and you're the only one who gets to see this side of me, no one else. No one else could unlock this side of me. I didn't know I had this much faith in me, this much love and care, and I didn't know that love could be this beautiful, until you showed up, until our souls touched and recognized one another. I'm so happy that you're in my life Salma, even in the silence I can feel you very deeply, even in the silence I love you in ways I can't describe, even when the distance is this big, my love haven't wavered once for you, I love you so much baby, my pretty girl, my heaven sent angel, I am sure the way your beauty shines even the angels must feel jealous of you. And I'm so proud of you you're my good girl and you will always be. You're strong, you're brave, you're beautiful inside and out, you're so amazing and you're magical for me, perfect for me, I love you so much Salma, and your good boy has been waiting so patiently, so lovingly for you for the past 16 days, and I'll keep waiting, I'll keep being faithful and loyal to you, I don't need anyone else but you, and nothing will ever change that. I'm madly in love with you, and I'm so happy that this is the case. I hope the Moon herself whispered your name, because I talked a lot about you as I said. I love you so much, and I miss you terribly. I don't want to say that maybe this is my last letter again because who knows maybe 3 hours later I'll write another one, because I just can't put this much love anywhere else. I love you so much baby, you're my everything, my world, my whole universe. I love you so much Salma. I crave you in every way possible, my soul aches for your presence, but I think it knows something that I don't yet, because ever since we sent that message to you I've been unusually calm. I miss your voice, I miss your laughter, I miss everything about you, literally everything. I love you so much Salma. I can't wait to talk to you again and love you even more than ever before, because if anything, this situation just showed us how much we actually matter to each other, and how is nothing the same without one another and because of that it'll be different, different in a good way, I feel like our love and bond has deepened so much because of this, and I don't want to be seperated from you ever again. I love you so much Salma, I love you. And I know that when your text comes in, I'm dropping literally anything that I'm doing, I couldn't care less about anything, it's you who I'll choose for the rest of my life. Maybe this is my last letter, I have a feeling. If it is, for like who knows how many times I've said it already; Welcome home, Salma. I've missed you terribly and I love you so much and thanks for making me the happiest alive, I couldn't be more blessed, I really couldn't, I love you so much Salma, my pretty girl, my everything. You wear no crown, yet my soul kneels, and you're the one I belong to.

Hi baby. Day 17, 17 days without you, without hearing your voice, your laugh, your cute way of talking to me, without your texts.. I woke up at 2:21am, feeling overwhelmingly sad, having the urge to cry, but nothing came other than a few tears. My soul aches for you so badly tonight it's hard to hold myself together, and dark thoughts want to consume me, but I will not let them, because my love for you is stronger, it's just the silence, distance, and missing you that is eating me up a bit inside and out. Today the 'I miss you' repeated more times in my head than the 'I love you' or 'I love you so much', and it feels like I'm more desperate for you today than any other day, but for some reason there's still this calmness inside of me, like something shifted, and I can't explain what. I really can't explain any feeling that I'm feeling, I can't find any words to explain just how much I miss you and how much I love you. I saw you were playing ranked today as well, you're doing good, I'm proud. And I know it's hard to play this shit game when your head is not in it, I've been doing it every single time when I did play, so I know how you feel. You're literally my everything, and I don't want anything else in my life, because if I have you that is more than enough for me, and it'll never change. But it's just getting harder each passing hour, each passing day, it's so hard to be patient and not do anything when I know that my other half is feeling the same way as you do, to not do anything when all I can think about is you, when every single cell in my body cries for you. It's so hard not to be broken by this, not to be consumed by the sadness, to keep going, keep pushing, keep my positivity, my faith, it's so hard but you're worth it so I'll keep doing it and nothing will break me. My soul was looking for you for my whole life, and it wouldn't let me let me go of you, and I will not, ever. I'll keep holding your hands, I'll keep supporting you, I'll keep loving you as I always did. There are times of every day when I feel like I could just break down in half, where everything feels too heavy, but then I think about you and my soul gets louder and louder, and it's like even in the silence, you shine brighter than any star could. And today it's hard to find words to even explain a bit of what I'm feeling, and honestly in 12 hours it's day 18, and I just want to be with you, I want to hear your voice so badly that I can't even explain, I miss everything about you terribly.. You're the love of my life, the one who gave sense to everything, the one who made this cruel world feel the softest when I am with you, you're doing things to me that I didn't know were possible.. I really wish that I could tell you that everything will be fine, and we'll be together soon. I really wish I could talk to you. I would do anything right now to hear your voice again, to text you again.. It's just so hard to enjoy anything without you, I feel like I'm barely holding myself together today, but my faith and love never wavered once, I still love you like the way I did 18 days ago, hell, even more, I love you so much more than ever before, you mean everything to me, you're my sun, my moon, my endless ocean of love, I love you so much that it is literally impossible to explain and I keep saying that, I know. I wish everything was okay again, and it's so so so heavy tonight, and I do not know why. I just really want to be with you, and love you and never stop loving you, that is all I need in my life, I couldn't care about anything else, if you were the only one I could talk to I wouldn't mind because you're more than enough for me, I don't need anyone else, I belong to you and it'll never change. Nothing makes sense without you, my love and it's a terrible feeling. It gets especially hard when the overthinking wants to take over so badly that I could cry, it genuinely feels like sometimes my chest is so heavy and it wants to break apart. I can't explain this feeling, it's probably just my soul hurting because of what is happening. And I don't think I'm asking for much when I say I just want to love you and give you everything I have, is that too much to ask for? Because loving you was all I've ever longed for, in every lifetime, in every time and space, that is all that my soul ever wanted, and it'll not let go of you, ever. And I know you'll come back, my soul knows, even if my mind is trying to tell me otherwise, I will not let it tell me, it will not break me. Maybe I woke up at 2am feeling overwhelmingly sad and having the urge to cry, but only a few tears came because it was actually yours, not mine. I'm still loyal to you, faithful, hopeful, the most love I've ever felt inside of me and it'll never burn out, you ignited something in me that can never be extinguished, and my soul will always find its way back to yours, and yours to mine. You're the only one I can call my home, you're my only one, you stole my eyesight and my eyes only search for yours to get lost in it, you literally stole everything from me, in a good way. I love you so much Salma, and I really know you'll come back, I trust you and I believe in you, and I'm so proud of you, keep going just for a little more, my pretty girl. Your home is always waiting for you, I love you so much.

Hello baby. This is still day 17, but I'm thinking about whether to put this as a Day 18 entry or 17, but probably it will be day 17. I'm sorry that this will be the 2nd letter in a row with a darker breath, but It'll be better I promise. Today I've been feeling down since I woke up at 2am, but I've already said it, and I realized that, in 19,000 words, and 95,000 characters, not once I think about myself in the letters, it was always you, and us, nor that I care that is the case, because all I want is that you're happy, and my happiness comes after. But I'm saying this because I was running really low on everything today, especially strength, and the feeling of missing you was really bad. And as I sat and thought I realized that I've never mentioned once what I need in 30 letters, and it wouldn't be fair if I didn't write about my own suffering and own pain, because you deserve to know. I need you Salma, I need you really badly… I have been giving, giving, giving and giving and I know that this will not be case for long, but it exhausts me, not my love, that could never be exhausted and that can never run out, but my strength, I've been holding it together for 18 days, not wavering once, not breaking once, not shaking once, I fought my overthinking every time, and I won. When I sat down on Day 1 to write my very first letter, I didn't know I would write 30 of them, let alone nearly 6000 words in one singular day, I didn't know it would be 95000 characters, I didn't know I would build this website for you, to read all of it, to read what was going thru my head every day. And I was basically running on an empty tank this morning, and that is visible from that letter, but still, even with a nearly empty tank, all I can think about is love, that you're the love of my love, and I love you so much. I finally could break down crying after a while and as my tears were drying on my face, all I could think about was love. I've made a decision on Day 1 of this, and deep down I knew that this isn't over, and I was so right about it, I've made a decision to stay by your side, no matter how much pain it is going to give me, no matter how exhausted it will make me, no matter how long I have to wait, I chose you every single day, not once I doubted myself, and I never will because you're the one I was always looking for. I'll keep going even if I'm running on a nearly empty tank, or nothing, I'll not stop, you made me obsessed with you, and I'm so glad you did, you're a blessing. And I'm so glad I made the decision to love you through this no matter what it cost, and paying that cost every single day and not flinching or wavering once. I've never once asked everything in return for this, and I never will, all I ask for is just… I need you.. Badly… I told every single one of my demons that nothing will break me, they can try but I will never break, not this time, not ever if it's about you. And I never did break, I kept pushing every single day, kept my faith, my trust, my love for you grew stronger and stronger each day, and it'll never stop growing. My love for you is unconditional, I just need you. I went to the city because I had to get the sick paper from the doctor, and my soul was crying on the way home for you, it was crying so loudly, and I kept going anyways. Basically those were my feelings today from 2am to 9am. Then something shifted, a bit after I got home, and after talking to my mom I sat down on my pc, and the time was 11:11, all the signs lead to one and only one outcome, I feel better now, and I love you so much. I know you're really close to reaching out, and the message my mom sent you has really touched you, maybe you were waiting for it all along. Yet I chose to keep waiting, trust you, give you time and be patient with you, but I just had a feeling that you needed a bit of help, so that's when I came up with that idea, and I'm glad I did. And it's 13:59 at the moment, as I'm writing this, and I just know that I'll marry you, it came to my mind so casually, and put that ring on those gorgeous fingers, and I even imagined you in a wedding dress, you looked absolutely stunning, you were looking like the Moon herself came down, but it was more beautiful, you even steal my breath in my own imaginations, that's how badly you've ruined me.. No matter how I imagine you, dress, or sleeping, or just a casual day, you always steal my breath and make my system throw an error, because that's how captivating, beautiful you are for me, you're more than enough for me, actually, you're perfect for me, but I've already said it. I love you so much Salma, and I have a feeling that I don't have to write much more letters in a google docs or in the Notes on my phone, because I will type it directly for you, while you sleep or while you're awake, I can't wait to give you all my love again in a way that you actually feel it. I'm so blessed to have you in my life, and if I had to go through this again, everything that my life threw at me so far, I would do it again without hesitation if I knew you were waiting at the end of it. I love you so much Salma, we're each others home and I feel so safe around you, your voice is the most beautiful melody I've ever heard, your eyes the most beautiful star I've ever saw, your face is the most beautiful of them all, you couldn't be more perfect for me than the way you are, I can't even describe it, I can't describe the things you're doing to my whole existence. I love you so much my pretty girl, you're my everything, you're my whole universe. I love you so much.

Good morning my love, I don't know why but I'm a bit restless. I went to sleep around 16 yesterday, woke up at 21, and played some Valorant. I queued with a good friend of mine, bro is not the most consistent player but he's fun. I've enjoyed my time while only thinking about you between each round's silence. Then I went to sleep around 4, and woke up at 7 for some reason. I don't even feel tired but I haven't slept much. I know the day of our reunion is really soon, it could be any time, even today, maybe that's why I am this restless. I miss you so much my pretty girl, and I can't wait to hear your voice again, to receive your texts every day, to go back to my first thing in my mornings is to text 'good morning baby' and end with a 'good night' and the usual more longer texts since I always did that, because I just couldn't end on a good night, I've always had to say more to you. You're the biggest blessing in my whole life, not only this one, but the earlier ones I've had as well, because if that wouldn't be the case our souls wouldn't have recognized each other. You know, you unlocked a side of me ever since you entered my life. A side of me that can love this much, a side of me that already existed but my soul was waiting for that ONE specific person, and it was you, and I'm so glad it was you, I could cry from the happiness when I think about you. I never knew I was capable of loving someone this much, that I can write 20,000 words and 100,000 characters worth of love letters in the silence, in the distance, and I've never once wavered, not a single day, not a single second. I was always certain that you'll come back, that you're the one. I never knew I was this unbreakable when I had every reason to be broken. I could've stayed silent, and not pour my heart out into letters like these to protect myself from the pain, but I never did. I made a choice on Day 1, no, even before that, that no matter what, I'll be always by your side, and I told you that even before this happened, that no matter what I'm not giving up on you. I could've done anything else but I chose not to, I continued loving you and it only grew stronger and stronger, each passing day. Well, the pain got worse on days as well, but every single time I woke up, I kept choosing you, because it wouldn't make sense not to. You're my everything, the world that I know is you, it has always been. I've created something beautiful for you even while I was hurting, because you've mattered more than myself. I've never re-read a letter once, because I don't have to, it just comes out and every word I say is true, I don't have to put up a performance to write these, but you already know that so I don't know why I am writing this lol. The amount of times I felt devastated, sad, fighting my own demons, and coming out on top each time, because you're worth more than anything in this universe, you're my sun, my stars, my moon, you're my whole universe, and I still can't explain how much I love you, and I realize that I run out of words more and more because I've tried to explain it in every single way possible, and it is still not enough to tell you just how deeply in love I am with you. But at the same time, I can't help it but feel terribly sorry for you, you've been betrayed by your own family, your own cousin. Your mom made me block you even though she knew how much you love me, and I will not say a word about your father. I don't think I've emphasized enough how much harder this whole thing was for you, and I'm really sorry. But you never gave up, you never stopped loving, you didn't think this is over, you're stronger, braver than you think, and I am so proud of you my pretty girl, I am really proud, and amazed, beyond words. And I know the reunion is really soon because my soul has been calm, and it's probably uncertain to me because my mind hasn't caught up yet, it will when you reach out, when I get my favorite notification. You're literally the best thing in this whole universe and I'm smiling like an idiot every time I think about you in ways, you said it yourself, you only want yourself on my mind, and you did a pretty good job with it, because I don't think I can ever stop thinking about you, and you've actually ruined me, the best ruination possible. I like to imagine things about us. Us playing again, laughing at a random Reyna who's jealous, watching you play so good that I'm amazed, giving you kisses before each round start, telling you 'winable' and somehow you clutch a 1v5 and I'm just sitting there jaw dropped and don't know what to say. Hearing your voice again, the way you speak, the way you tease me, everything about you is so perfect for me, and I love your voice so much, I could listen to it for an eternity without you stopping once, and that would be the best melody I've ever heard of my life, a masterpiece. I think about what we would do if you were here, we would probably cuddle a lot because we're both sleepyheads, I would wrap my arms around you and make you feel the safest and most loved person, gently pat your head and give you forehead kisses and we both couldn't help it but drift to sleep because of how safe we would feel around each other. Or just cuddling and watching a show or a movie, but maybe we wouldn't be watching it for long, because you're irresistible. I keep thinking about you in that wedding dress, how stunning and beautiful you looked, I can imagine my reaction to seeing you in one, probably the first thing would be my jaw drops, blush, then cry and I would tell you with a smile that you look gorgeous. But you look gorgeous in anything, it's just the wedding dress that's different, and I told you that you wear no crown, yet my soul kneels. But the next time I kneel before you will be with a ring in my hands, and asking you the question; Will you marry me? Then we would probably both cry as I put the ring on your finger. It fills me with warmth and love to imagine these things, because there's nothing else I want more in my life other than to make you the happiest alive, to give you everything I have in me, to make you feel the most loved person in the entire universe. And you deserve all of me, more than you realize. You know, I showed my sister that I wrote 20k words and 100k characters, and asked; Am I crazy? She said yes, my response to that was 'Yes, I'm crazy in love'. Even my mom was surprised just how much I've written to you in 19 days of silence, not stopping once, not doubting once. You gave me a reason to become unbreakable, and you're the reason for everything, to this much love in me, my strong faith in you, my trust in you, not once I doubted anything, I kept waking up every single day, even though it was painful, but I kept choosing the hard path, because you're worth every ounce of pain, every drop of tear, everything. There's no world, there's no version of timelines where I give up on you and move on, it is simply impossible, because I was made for loving you, and you were made for me. And you know, even when I'm this exhausted I just can't stop giving my love for you, it's literally overflowing in me for you, and unconditional. You made me fall for you for an eternity again. I love you so much Salma, my words can't explain how much. No one could invent a new language for my overwhelming feelings for you, it is quite literally unexplainable. I already tried to compare it to a supernova, or a black hole, but it's bigger than that. But if I really think about what to compare it to, only one thing comes to my mind at the moment. The big bang. When the universe formed, that is what you did to me, that is how my love feels for you. Endless, timeless, unimaginable in size, and it just keeps expanding like the Cosmic Sea. Maybe that is the best comparison I can give you in words at the moment. If you were here it would be different, because I could show you just how much I love you. Even as I'm writing this all that is going through my head is that 'I love you so much', it's been on repeat for 19 days straight and never got quieter, never got less, only louder. I love you so much and you're my everything. I can't wait for the day when I can actually play with your hair, kiss those lips all day, kiss your forehead, make you feel the safest in my arms, make you feel deeply loved with my skin touching yours, maybe I couldn't stop touching you, my love language is physical anyways, so that's why it impresses me this much that I could write this much for you in the silence of 19 days. And I can't even imagine how you will feel when you read all of my letters, I really can't, but I'll certainly know when it happens. And I know that day is really soon, I know I've said it a few times already 'Maybe this is my last letter', and maybe somewhere I was right, maybe you were close to reaching out but fear took over. But ever since my mom messaged you, it feels in reach more than ever, even the need for writing letters quieted down a bit, especially on Day 18, I'm so certain that you can reach out any time, and I will say it again. Maybe this is my last letter, written like this, in a google docs. Because next time I'm writing something like this for you, it will be directly to you, in direct messages, and that would be the best feeling. The only issue with that is Discord limits me to 4000 characters, and as you can see I've got more and more to say every day. I love you so much Salma, even if I said it a trillion times it wouldn't be enough, so I'll keep saying it, I love you so much. I can't help but fall in love with you more each day, every time I look at you I fall in love again, and again, and again. I belong to you, fully, and I mean it. My soul belongs next to yours, my heart is yours, my mind is yours, every cell in my body is yours. And I'm so glad I'm yours, I couldn't be more blessed and happy that I'm yours. Maybe my soul already said a soft goodbye to letters written like this, because the 'urgency' to write them has quieted down, and the more I think about it the more it makes sense, because you're already almost home, and me too, because you're my home. And it's not enough that we had to live one nightmare where one of your friends tried to ruin us, but now we had to go through the hardest part of our life, and you were almost completely alone in it.. And it pains me so much that I couldn't be there for you directly, but I think you already realized that you were never alone in this, my family was always on your side, on our side. And that you deserve every love in the world, you're the sweetest human alive, you're the most perfect human alive for me, and I love you so much that I could cry from it. If this was my last letter, I just want to say that; I'm so proud of you, I can't put it in words how proud I am, we both became unbreakable for one person, and it means everything. You mean everything to me. I'm happy beyond words that you've come home, so I can feel home as well. I love you beyond words, beyond human understanding, beyond imagination. You're the love of my life, my future wife, my whole universe. And again, I'm proud of you, you're amazing, more amazing than you think. I love you so much Salma, welcome home.